You read the title right...I'm taking a break from blogging. I just feel like it's almost a burden to me to blog, and to read all the blogs I try to keep up with. I may check in every now and then, but don't expect anything from me until after school starts at least.
Why, you may ask?
I just got up from laying with the girl in her bed. I needed that time with her. Every night, I'm always so rushed to get the kids in bed so that I can spend time on the computer and "get a break" from them. I spend ungodly amounts of time on the computer during the day when I'm home with them. It's just not fair to them. And I knew it wasn't all along, but I wasn't willing to give it up. I guess like an addiction, almost.
But tonight, I was so rushed and frustrated and irritated about getting them in bed (and I don't know what the rush was...it's summer after all) that I was not a very nice mama. And I could tell that they were feeling unloved tonight. So after some thinking, I went back in and laid down with the girl because she was upset and crying. She had stopped crying because I threatened her that she wouldn't go to her golf/tennis/swim camp beginning tomorrow. She was almost asleep, but I knew I needed to lay down with her. So I did. And the tears just started flowing. I apologized for being ugly tonight and she forgave me.
After she was asleep, I got up and just starting bawling to Jim. I just feel like I've lost so much time. She's starting first grade. I don't spend the time I need to spend with them, especially her, since her love language is quality time. I need to spend as much time with them as possible until school starts, at least. Blogging should not be a priority in my life, but I've made it to be. And in fact, to be real honest with myself and with you, it's become more of a priority than my Savior.
So, I'm giving this up for now. I want to be a better mom to my children, beginning now. And for that to happen, I've got to spend more time with them and with the Lord.
Adieu!
2 comments:
oh Ash. You are such a good mama. I am proud of you!
Thank you for posting this! As I was reading it I was instantly convicted because I feel as though I do the same thing. Checking facebook, blogs, email, playing bejeweled blitz, etc. has become more of a priority than spending time with my children or having a quiet time. It shows character that you were able to write this to your friends and family. You are an amazing mother and your children are blessed to have you! Thank you again for the encouragement!
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